Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Joy and Fulfillment
How do you find joy and fulfillment as a stay at home mom? When my daughter was younger I found it in her milestones and in new ways I could interact with her. Now that she is three she is needing me much less and I'm having a hard time being joyful. I'm currently 29 weeks pregnant with our son. This makes it physically challenging to be the mom that I want to be. With my daughter I feel at a loss of what to do with her. She'd rather play by herself than with me. I'm not finding happiness in the mundane meal planning and house cleaning that is my life right now. I don't know if a job is the answer, but it can't be the solution right now due to me being pregnant. I went to a "mom" conference this weekend. They posed the question, "What are your dreams, goals, and aspirations?" I don't have any for myself. I used to. It used to be all about me. Now the only goals I have are for my children. I feel like "my life" is over. Now it's all about my husband and my children. This is the number one reason I said I didn't want to get married and have children. I was afraid of losing myself...and I did.
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It's such a hard balance to be a mom, wife & individual. It seems it is so easy to loose the individual part in the chaos of caring for others. It is so important to keep in touch with your inner self. I struggle with it but I do try very hard to set aside time for me to do things I enjoy. It will get easier after the pregnancy, I promise. My oldest is 12 and my youngest is 8 months & I really struggled through the pregnancy of my 2nd. Hang in there momma :)
ReplyDeletei know i'm incredibly late commenting on this, but i know how you feel. being an only child, everything was always all about me. I definitely get frustrated and feel like i've lost "me" in the daily duties of life. i don't have any great answers, but know that you're not the only one in this boat!
ReplyDeleteI find fulfillment by knowing that no one else will do what you do for your family. Wherever you work, anyone else can replace you, but in your family you are irreplaceable.
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